Wednesday, January 08, 2003

hi pple*, finally a place to crap in. been thinking of something like this for a long time, but a diary just isnt the right thing for me. i'm in the midst of some shitty holidaes right now, and i'm totally bored to death. the longest ever thing that i have ever stuck on doing is breaking, the thing is i rilly love breakin, it helps me vent my frustration (on my own body, haha, but this is besides the point) and i rilly feel like myself when breakin. the problem is that i don break very well (getting frustated here), hmmm, never mind. i'm bent on getting my mountain bike, if i ever get it, i'm kissing breakin ass goodbye.
the next longest best* thing that happened to me is my girlfren, she is jaq*. she is my very first and i'm glad its her, not any other one else. i'm rilly happy when she is ard me, but the thing is she is not often ard me, normally busy with her skool stuff. maybe* she is better off without me. i'm rilly a jerk, haha ( this is again besides the point).i guess we can always work something out, but now, i think she needs to study. besides this, there are many complications to our relationship. the fact that she was* my friend's crush* gulits me. her fren disagree to me and her together, but wat the hell, but it rilly bothers her. think i can work that out too right, pple*. wish me luck.

yeah, my very first post for the year '03. i would like to thank ben for telling me this great stuff, its almost like heroin, getting addicted to it. my chest feels lighter wid this shit off it, sigh~~~.

just thankful to be alive- bert

*pple = people who happen to stumble upon this web thingy
*jaq = not her real name, to protect her identity
*best = for the year '02
*maybe = from my own point of view
*crush = a person u rilly like, but doesnt like u back, makes u so frustrated, u feel like crushing him or her
*was = in the past, he still likes her, bothers me, but wat the hell
gilbert at 5:18 AM [comment]

{I hear voices, voices only half as humane as mine..}